1. Can I borrow a quarter? I want to call my mom and tell her I just met the girl of my dreams.
2. Is your daddy a thief? Then who stole the sparkle of the stars and put them into your eyes?
3. Will you go out with me?………. to McDonald’s? +
4. Can I flirt with you?
5. Blonde, James Blonde… Jr. =
6. I looked up the word BEAUTIFUL in the thesaurus taday, and your name was included.
7. I’ve had a really bad day and it always makes me feel better to see a pretty girl smile. So…
would you please smile for me?
8. Hey, somebody farted. Lets get out of here!
9. You’ve got the whitest teeth I have ever seen!
10. Excuse me, but what pick up line works best for you?
11. Hi, what’s a girl like you doing in a nice place like this?
12. Hi, can I buy you a car?
13. Excuse me, I seem to have lost my phone number, can I please borrow yours?
14. Do you have a boyfriend?
No?! Well do you want one?
Oh, you do? Well, when you want a MANfriend, come talk to me!
15. Can I have directions?… to your heart?
16. For a minute there I thought I had died and gone to heaven, but now I realize that I am very much alive, and that heaven has been brought to me.
17. Have you always been this cute, or did you have to work at it?
18. Hey, don’t I know you? Yah, you’re that girl with the beautiful smile!
19. You know, you might be asked to leave soon. You’re making the other women look really bad.
20. Hi, you’re cute!
21. Hi, are you legal? No, your to hot to be legal.
22. I’m not drunk, I’m just intoxicated by you.
23. You know, girls like you give guys like me a reason to live.
24. Even the word Chicka-mama doesn’t describe you! -
25. Is there an airport nearby or is that just my heart taking off?
26. Nice socks, can I try them on? +
27. Can I carry your books?
28. Your father must be a drug dealer, cuz you dope!
29. Your father must be an alien, because there’s nothing else like you on earth!
30. Your dad must be an awsome baker, because you have rad buns!
31. You know, if I could rearange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.
32. Out of curiosity, were you born on a plane? cuz baby, you’re FLY!
33. Hey, what are the chances of a guy like me, picking up a girl like you? +
34. Hi, do you dig guys who use cheesy pick up lines? +
35. Hi, will you reject me if I try and pick you up? +
36. I advise you to surrender imediately or I’ll have to use a pick up line. -
37. If I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! -
38. It’s a good thing I brought my gloves today, other wise you’d be too hot to handle! -
39. Yesterday, I found this magic lamp and I asked the genie to let you to fall in love with me… did it work? -
40. Is your name Gellete? cuz your the best a man can get.
41. So I heard you got the hots for me!
42. Hey, I know you, yah, you’re that girl in the supermarket looking for the jamacan banana! +
43. That’s amazing! You’re eyes are the exact same color as my porche!
44. Are you tired? cuz you’ve been running around in my mind all day!
45. I know milk does a body bood, but how much have you been drinking?!!!!!
46. Are those space pants? cuz your legs are out of this world!
47. It’s a good thing I have my library card, because I’m checkin’ you out!
48. Hey good lookin’, what’s cookin’?
49. See these arms? They are just dying to be wrapped around you! +
50. Reproducing, eh? Mind if I help? (ya kinda need to be at a copy maching for this one)
51. Do you mind if I stare at you up close, instead of from across the room?
52. Hey baby, got any cavities?
53. If I asked you…… would you marry me? +
54. I got a word for you in my secret language, it’s Chicka-mama! -
55. I’ll see you later, I have to pick up my new porche.
56. Are you a model? =
57. Do you want to come over? My mom wants to be the first one to meet the girl of my dreams! +
58. I’m a stud, not a dud! =
59. Hey, I’m writing a love letter to you, how exactly do you spell BEAUTIFUL? +
60. My heart combination is LOVE! =
61. Wanna get married in the temple? (you sort of have to be Mormons to use this one)
62. My pits say, you smell good! =
63. If it startd to rain, would you come under my unbrella? +
64. Hey, is it hot in here, or it that just you?
65. Am I hot or what?
66. You are beautiful in every language! +
67. If beauty were measured in seconds, you’d be an hour!
68. I thought I’d come over and say hello before you caught me staring.
69. Was it love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
70. So are you ever going to talk to me, or were you just going to continue to stare?
71. You have the academic look I just lust after.
72. You’re cute! Mind if I use you so I can impress my friends?
73. Can I buy you a soda, or do you just want the money?
74. I’ve got a thirst baby, and you smell like my Gatoraid!
75. Nice boots, want a meaningful relationship?
76. What? Do you want one of us to come over there and bite you are something?
77. Hey, I’m bored. Entertain me and I’ll buy you a root beer.
78. You look like the type of girl that has heard every line in the book, so what’s one more?
79. Hi, the voices in my head tole me to come over and talk to you.
80. Hi, all my friend call me sheldon. +
81. Hey, I’m in a rock band! +
82. Hey honey, I got money!
83. Are you Sweadish? cuz you’re the sweetish girl I’ve met!
- or – cuz you’re the sweetish fish in the sea!
84. Excuse me, but you owe me a soda! cuz when i saw how beautiful you were, I dropped mine.
85. How are you? ["Fine"] Darn right you are.
86. My name is Peter Pan, cuz I can take you to Never Never Land.
87. I’m gonna follow you home.
88. You are a cruel thief, cuz you stole my heart!
89. If I followed you home, would you keep me?
90. Do you have a map? I just keep getting lost in your eyes.
91. Are you O.K.? because it’s a long fall from heaven.
92. I’m sorry, I’m an artist and it’s my job to stare at beautiful women!
93. Hey, I’m a professional wrestler, can I get ya in a headlock? Don’t worry, I get paid to do this! +
94. I know I don’t look like much now, but I’m drinking milk.
95. What does it feel like to be the most beautiful girl in this room?
96. You must be from Tennassee! Because you are the only TEN I see!
97. Yo baby, gimme yo digits! +
98. You know what I think? I think that it is about time you stop ignoring me. Let’s say we engage in a meaningless conversation… +
99. Hey, can you do me a HUGE favour!? Ask me on a date in front of my friend over there? +
100. Do you alway wear your shoes over your socks?
101. See my friend over there? (he waves sheepishly from afar) Well, he wants to know if you think I’m cute!
32 lines to get sugar
1. I bet you a dollar I can kiss you without touching you. (kiss) Here’s your dollar.
2. Hey, what would you do if I kissed you right now?!!
3. Hey, normaly I charge girls when they kiss me, but for you I’ll make an exeption. -
4. Kiss me if I’m wrong but haven’t we met before?
5. Wanna get some pizza and KISS?… No!? you don’t like pizza?!!
6. So hey, I hear you’re a great kisser. +
7. Do you like peanut butter? Do you want to kiss?
8. Do you want to play spin the bottle? Come on! +
9. Did you know that kissing prolongs life? +
10. Doesn’t this musick make you want to kiss? +
11. My friend bet me ten bucks you wouldn’t kiss me, so lets say I give you half and you do.
12. Do you want to dance? No?! Then I guess kissing is out of the question, eh?
13. If I were elvis, would you kiss me?
14. Here’s the deal, give me a kiss and if I don’t like it, I swear I’ll give you a full refund. +
15. If you kiss me, I promise to stop bugging you.
16. Hey baby, how about some kissing lessons? I’m a professional amateur! ^+
17. Yo mama, how about some lip wrestling? ^
18. Is it cold in here, or are you just afraid to kiss me? +
19. If I was the last man on Earth, I bet you would kiss me in public!
20. Hey, you wanna know what I heard about you? Kiss me and I’ll tell you.
21. Hey, my lips can dance just as good as me! let’s kiss! +
22. i’m usually better looking! give me a kiss and i’ll turn into a prince!
23. hugs are for wusses, give me a kiss! +
24. i’ll give you 10 bucks if you kiss me right now in front of my friend over there!
25. Do you believe in obeying the scriptures? read this… (2 corinthians 13:12) +
26. hey girls, each of you pick a number between 1 & 100. you win! (kiss the girl who’s the hottest and run) +%
27. Didn’t anyone tell you that you wanted to kiss me?!?! I thought you knew???
28. Kiss me if I am wrong, but you want to go out with me, don’t you…
29. Kiss me if I’m wrong, but isn’t your name… ?
30. Hi, I’m not trying to pressure you, I don’t want to kiss without mutual consent; but by the way, you have my consent, don’t worry!
31. My lips are registered weapons. Watch out, cuz your on my wanted list!
32. I am a magical being, I command you to kiss me. NOW! (stretch your arms out and wiggle your fingers)
Even More Pick Up Lines
1) Hello, you caught my attention but I’m in the middle of a conversation with an old friend of mine. Let me buy you a soda now, and I’ll be back in a few minutes because I’d really like to meet you!
2) Hey baby, wanna wrestle? +
3) I’m not Elmo, but you can tickle me anytime you like!
4) I’d walk a million miles to see one of your smiles.
5) Hey, if i wistled at you, would you stop and talk to me??? +
6) You can’t be sisters! That’s not fair to the rest of the family trees to have 2 peices of fruit as beautiful as you. +
7) Hey, how old do you think i am? +
9) Hey, can i butt into your personal life? +
10) Do you think i have a chance with you? +
11) Hey, what’s your name? Wow! Did you know what the ancient greek translation for your name is? Your name means… “Godess of Beauty!” +
12) Did you want to go out with me, or do you just get a kick out of playing hard to get? +
13) Hey, my email address is: “sheldon@studly_and_available.com”. +
14) Hey, can i buy you some flowers? +
15) Hey babalicious, are you chewable… i mean available? +
16) Are your hands cold? +
17) Wanna see my socks? +
18) Do you have even the slightest idea of how beautiful you are? +
19) Do you always have to look this good?! You are driving me bananas! +
20) I bit the last girl who turned “me” down! +
21) Why are you ignoring me? You haven’t said a word to me all day! +
22) (Give them a flower) “I just wanted to show this flower how beautiful you are!”
23) Hey, my dentist says i have perfect theeth! (you need milk duds caught in your teeth for this one to work!) +
24) Who are you waiting for? … are you sure you aren’t waiting for me??? +
25) It’s girls like you that make days like this, all the more beautiful! +
26) So uh, … what um… are you, uh… doing on uhm… you know … like on Saturday night?
27) Would you like to help me with my self esteem?
28) I am looking for someone with a good head on their shoulders. I just hate necks.
29) Excuse me, but … would you like to see my collection of curly nose hairs?
30) Are you religious? Good, because I’m the answer to your prayers.
31) Are those space pants??? Because your buns are out of this world!
32) Do you want to dance? No? NO! i said you look fat in those pants!
33) Achoo! Sorry, i must be alergic to your good looks!
34) If beauty were a drop of water, you’d be an ocean!
35) Man, you sure are easy on the eyes!
36) You’re walkin’ like you want a boyfriend! so… want one?
37) Hey, open your mouth! i just want to see if you are as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside! +
38) do you have stars on your underwear? becuase your butt is out of this world!
39) Your good looks are lethal! you’re killing me! +
40) Do you have a license to kill? becuase your good looks are killing me! +
41) Even if you were a cactus, i would still want to hug you! +
42) So hey, your friend told me you got the hots for me… i think she’s right! +
43) Hey, here’s the signals: thumbs up it’s good, thumbs down it’s bad. here’s the plan: you stay right here, don’t take off on me! i’m gonna go over there behind that bush, and when you see me pop my head out, give me the signal wether you would go on a date with me or not, k? see you soon! +
44) hey, wanna hold the preisthood?
45) i get so frustrated when hot chicks like you only look as far as the surface, cant you see my inner beauty??? +
46) i dont have time for long goodbyes… so here. (hug and run!)%
47) i dont have time for those lame cheezy pickuplines, so i’ll just say your one hot mama! %+
48) quick call 9-11, ther’s about to be a crime committed (hug and run) hug and run, hug and run! +
49) sorry for what i’m about to do. (hug and run)%
50) i hope you dont take any offence to this but… (hug and run)%
51) whats your name? oh thats nice, i’ll probly never see you again, so… (hug and run)+%
52) pick a number between 1 and 101. (say the pick up line they choose) +
53) wanna see a magic trick? i can dissapear real fast, watch! close your eyes… (hug and run) +
54) hey wanna go on a date? (put a date on ground, pick her up in your arms [pick a hot chick, preferably skinny] and stand on the date.) how long do you want to be on this date for? +
55) ever since i was a kid, my mom has taught me the importance of household chores, the most useful chore she ever taught me was how to sweep. because now as i’ve gotten older… and wiser, i can now sweep girls off there feet! (pick up the girl but do not drop her) +
56) you’re lucky good looks dont start fires, becuase you could burn down a forest! +
57) i’m gonna cry, quick, hold me! ha ha ha +
58) hey, i’ve got something for you (when they open there hand, hold it)
59) you are too pretty for words!
60) Your eyes are as blue as window cleaner.
61) Hey you’re in my seat!
62) Do you have any raisins?’
“No I don’t.”
‘You don’t have any raisins? Well then, how about a date?’
63) I saw you at the party last weekend and you look kind of interesting. Let’s meet sometime.
64) Did the sun come out or did you just smile at me?
65) Hey, if I wistled at you, would you stop and talk to me? +
66) Hey, lucky you… it’s National Hug Day! (hug and run) +
67) If you were a tear in my eye I would not cry for fear of losing you.
68) My lenses turn dark in the sunshine of your love!
69) So there you are! I’ve been looking all over for YOU, the girl of my dreams!
70) Stand still so I can pick you up!
71) Would you touch me so I can tell my friends I’ve been touched by an angel?
72) Wouldn’t we look cute on a wedding cake together?
73) [Grab her tush.] Pardon me, is this seat taken?
74) Your eyes are blue, like the ocean. And baby, I’m lost at sea
75) Your name must be Mickey because your so fine.
76) You’re daddy must be a hunter because he sure caught a fox!
77) Can you say constantinople backwards? Me neither, but I just wanted to ask. (elponitnatsnoc)
78) Can you spell ICUP? “I-C-U-P” You saw me pee?!?!? (laugh profusely)
79) I am very, very lonely, and I was wonderin’…
80) would you like to help me with my self esteam?
81) would you go on a date with me sometime?
82) You are just truly absolutely beautiful!
83) If you were a booger I’d pick you first.
84) Your name is Sandra, huh? Can I call you Sandy? Really? what’s your phone number, and what time can I call? are you sure boys are allowed to call you???
85) Are my undies showing? “No.” Would you like them to?
86) Hey, are you one of those chicks who goes out with guys right off the bat? ‘Cause that’s what I’m looking for.
87) Congratulations! You’ve been voted “Most Beautiful Girl In This Room” and the grand prize is a date with me!
88) Hey, I need your help! My mom says that if I don’t get a date by tomorrow, she’s putting me up for adoption! Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease…
89) Hey, check these out! (flex your bicepts) +
90) Your hands look cold. Do you want me to warm them up?
91) Girl, you so fine! I wish I could plant you and grow a hole field of you!
92) Baby, you must be a broom, cause you just swept me off my feet.
93) I think I can die happy now, ‘cause I’ve just seen a piece of heaven.
94) Baby, you’re so sweet, you gonna put Hershey’s outta business!
95) I just had to come talk with you. Sweetness is my weakness.
96) Is it hot in here or is it just you?
97) Nice to meet you, I’m Sheldon and you’re Gorgeous!
98) You make me melt like hot fudge on a sundae.
99) So, what do you do for a living besides making guys excited and warm all over?
100) Were your parents Greek Gods? ’cause it takes two Gods to make a Goddess!
101) What does it feel like to be the most beautiful girl in this room?
102) What’s that on your face? Oh, must just be beauty… Here, let me get it off. Hey, it’s not coming off???
103) Ya know, you are really hot! You must be the real reason for global warming.
104) Excuse me, but you have a beep on your nose. “What?” (Reach up and gently squeeze her nose) BEEP!
105) Hi, my name is Sheldon, how do you like me so far?
106) Chicks dig me. I wear colored undywear.
107) Hey, wanna take me out for ice cream sometime??? +
108) Hey, you’re the cosine of an isosolece triangle and i’m a tangent on the same side of the transversal! +
109) i’m gonna put this blind fold on, ok? and now i’m gonna sing you a song, and if you are still standing (or sitting) there when i’m done singing and I take the blind fold off, then that means that either you like my singing, or else you think i’m a hot stud and you want a date with me. ok, here I go… today i’m gonna be singing, “someone’s in the kitchen with Dina”
| (Some Guy) |  | Hey, germophobes: That shower is actually making you dirtier |
I Think therefore I am single…
DOCTOR:
Recently a love-bug injected in me strange bacteria, making me desirous of marriage.
I’m looking for a girl who is patient and has knowledge of all ills and pills, is religious minded and keeps away from all sins be it anaSin, metaSin or croSin.
I promise to be a good doctor with no side effects.
Apply or reply.
SOFTWARE ENGINEER: Wanted a Girl with a Lovely Look & Feel, Good GUI with Security features (privileges only for the Specific User especially critical Functionalities). There must not be any Critical or Medium Bug in her. Low Bugs can be deferred But needs to B fixed by the Next Build. She must not be PLATFORM INDEPENDENT, USER FRIENDLY. We are ready to Test the Application & CERTIFY the product but we will assure it will never be released to ANY OTHER Customer.
BEGGAR: Allah ke nam pe koi ek biwi de de, Doosre ki nahi to apni hi de de, Allah tujhe ek ke badle do dega, Hillary hogi to Monika bhi dega
LAWYER: I hereby beg to solicit myself as an eligible candidate for the post of husband after marriage.
The person whom I’m looking for should be strictly a girl. The girl should be strictly a girl.
The girl should be willing to surrender to the service and jurisdiction of My Lord i.e. My self.
Any objection would be overruled and will not be sustained. Apply in confidence and if you have the confidence.
BANKER: Wanted wife who takes interest in me and credits me with her service.
SHAYAR: Badi muddat ke baad ek arzoo jaagi hai, Ki hum bhi shadi shuda ho jaye, Kya vajah shadi karane ki jo kahde sahi sahi, To yaaron ab khud se kaam ghar ka hota nahi.
DRUNKARD: Wanted a girl. Girl’s father should preferably have a soda factory.
I am an occasional alcoholic who drinks only when friends come home.
Friends come home only seven times a week.
Girl preferred will carry me from bar to ghar-bar. Meet personally or send soda for trial. Sample should be ample.
CAR MECHANIC: Wanted a sturdy wife.
Should be in working condition.
Should be above average and must run the household at a good average.
I just want to thank all of you for your educational e-mails over the past year. I am totally sc****up now and have little chance of recovery.
I no longer open a public bathroom door without using a paper towel or have them put lemon slices in my ice water without worrying about the bacteria on the lemon peel.
I can’t use the remote in a hotel room because I don’t know what the last person was doing while flipping through the adult movie channels.
I can’t sit down on the hotel bedspread because I can only imagine what has happened on it since it was last washed.
I have trouble shaking hands with someone who has been driving because the number one pastime while driving alone is picking ones nose (although cell phone usage may be taking the number one spot).
Eating a little snack sends me on a guilt trip because I can only imagine how many gallons of trans fats I have consumed over the years.
I can’t touch any woman’s purse for fear she has placed it on the floor of a public bathroom.
I MUST SEND MY SPECIAL THANKS to whoever sent me the one about poop in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet sponge with every envelope that needs sealing.
ALSO, now I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.
I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me, and St. Theresa’s Novena has granted my every wish.
THANKS TO YOU I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.
BECAUSE OF YOUR CONCERN, I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.
I no longer can buy gasoline without taking someone along to watch the car so a serial killer won’t crawl in my back seat when I’m pumping gas.
I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr. Pepper since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put ‘Under God’ on their cans.
I no longer use Saran Wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.
AND THANKS FOR LETTING ME KNOW I can’t boil a cup of water in the microwave anymore because it will blow up in my face… disfiguring me for life.
I no longer receive packages from UPS or Fed Ex since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.
I no longer shop at Target since they are French and don’t support our American troops or the Salvation Army.
I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica , Uganda , Singapore , and Uzbekistan .
I no longer buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have their recipe.
THANKS TO YOU I can’t use anyone’s toilet but mine because a big brown African spider is lurking under the seat to cause me instant death when it bites my butt.
AND THANKS TO YOUR GREAT ADVICE I can’t ever pick up $5.00 dropped in the parking lot because it probably was placed there by a sex molester waiting underneath my car to grab my leg.
I can no longer drive my car because I can’t buy gas from certain gas companies!
I can’t do any gardening because I’m afraid I’ll get bitten by the brown recluse and my hand will fall off.
Oh, by the way…
A German scientist from Argentina , after a lengthy study, has discovered that people with insufficient brain activity read their e-mail with their hand on the mouse.
Don’t bother taking it off now, it’s too late.
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